It's 9:20 and the kids are eating chips and salsa for their bedtime snack, a few feet away. A loaf of whole-wheat bread, fresh from the bread machine, is cooling on the counter. I happen to know there is a cabinet over the stove that is stuffed full of dark chocolate and leftover Halloween candy. Plus, there's about two and a half pounds of my favorite pasta salad in the fridge, right next to a big bowl of leftover steak-and-black-bean fajitas.
Right now, I am not tempted to eat any of it. I mean, it's true that a few hours ago I almost ate a piece of salami the kids dropped on the floor, but I didn't, and right now I'm hungry but okay.
I could feel my stomach growling as I drove home from picking up Oscar at his evening class, about an hour ago. I noticed something interesting: I wasn't thinking of the growly tummy as a "bad" sensation, Something About Which Something Must Be Done. It was just... well, there, the way my tiredness was there near the end of the day. Both will stop bothering me when I fall asleep tonight. I'll be ravenous in the morning, and that is just fine, because in the morning there will be an egg.
It's just there... something I don't need to deal with now, something I can deal with later.
This has taken practice.
You are my inspiration. Being in the first trimester, I was appalled when my doctor told me I could not eat after 6pm. I'm having problems with reflux into my windpipe, causing bronchitis, pneumonia, all those fun lung infections requiring antibiotics. Then, I thought of you. I had myself convinced that I needed food to stave off the morning sickness (that occurs for me mostly before bed). I even told my doctor she was off her rocker. But, I have made it now, the last two nights not eating after 7pm (we eat late). What's harder is she's got me on meds now that I have to take right away upon rising that require I wait 1 hour before eating. Let me tell you, I set that timer and I'm eating like a starving person when the bell dings. The upside is maybe I won't gain so much weight this pregnancy. Oh, and she's nixed all my favorite foods as triggering the reflux - imagine me with no chocolate, no coffee, NO DIET COKE. Okay, I haven't quite taken all those steps yet, but I will before the next week is out because I think it's better to work through the grief in stages. Thanks for the inspiration to do it!
Posted by: Cathie B | 13 November 2008 at 09:53 AM
Oh yuck!
Are you sure that chocolate triggers reflux? I refuse to believe it!
Posted by: bearing | 13 November 2008 at 10:23 AM