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23 May 2021


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"I feel physical revulsion, partly because of the clouds of aerosols that I am now hyper-aware that everyone is exhaling all the time, but also a spiritual revulsion: because of the more acute knowledge I now have about the general regard for the sick and poor (or even for simple obedience and charity). It's going to take me a while to get over that, probably longer than it will take for me to stop thinking about clouds of aerosols."

I am sitting with you right here in the spiritual revulsion. Honestly our newfound knowledge of aerosols doesn't bother me much, but my newfound knowledge of the preening self-righteousness of my co-religionists is much harder to swallow right now.


I’m really grateful for the time we spent reading The Friendship of Christ, especially the chapter in “Christ in the Church.” Because while of course the Church is our own parish and our neighbor in it, the Church is also more than that. Serve Christ and the Church by diligently serving our neighbor; but best not rely on only our immediate neighbor to find and take nourishment from the friendship of Christ. Thank God for the mystical Body of Christ, and for the Church Suffering and Triumphant...


One of the things that has helped me deal with, as Jenny says, "the preening self-righteousness" is to bear in mind that many of these people don't believe in the pandemic. I don't think that excuses behavior, because I think they're blatantly wrong, but they haven't decided that they don't care about the safety of others - they don't see this about safety at all, but about freedom alone because there is (in their minds) no threat. Not quite so callous, even if just as physically dangerous. The same with those who would hype up the ethical problems with the vaccine - since there is (they think) no threat, why on earth would you take any vaccine, let alone one with such antecedents? Reminding myself of this gives me just enough room to pray for them instead of mentally glaring at them and gnashing my teeth.

Beautiful meditation on custody of eyes and heart - thank you. Quite the challenge.

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