bearing blog

"Oh, Four and a half is _so_ gonna get that cookie."

4 1/2, chez Finslippy.

Hey Roman, what's up?

Amy points out --- "those church signs in Kansas City are talking again."

Perspective on the elections.

From finslippy.

Am I a bad person?

Because I laughed at this.

OK, try this one.

The last humorous link was a dud, so... this?

h/t Eve Tushnet.

Seven sacraments. Twelve apostles. Seventeen syllables.

Results of a Catholic haiku contest at Ironic Catholic.

The "winner and champeen" made me laugh out loud.  I am not sure why, but it appeals to me.

h/t Happy Catholic.

A penny for your thoughts.

From Literal Minded.

Holyoffice does it again...

The Da Vinci Code FAQ.

Q: Is "The Da Vinci Code" fiction?
A: No. It's what I call "faction": Historically true facts interspersed with car chases. In the very first page of his masterpiece, Brown writes, "All descriptions of artwork, architecture, documents, and secret rituals in this novel are accurate."

Q: Well, if it's in a book, it must be true.
A: Exactly...

Q: Why isn't any of this in the Bible?
A: It is - but not the Bible the Man wants you to read! The truth uncovered by Brown is contained in scriptures like The Gospel of Thomas and The Secret Gospel of Oprah, works that depict the truth of Jesus' humanity and marriage, despite being written several hundred years after the canonical gospels.

Q: How do we know these non-canonical works are more accurate than the canonical ones?
A: Because the people who regarded them as sacred came out on the losing end.

Q: So, the fact that they were ultimately less popular and successful than the canonical gospels means they're true?
A: As Elaine Pagels explains it, yes.

Q: So, in that case, is the "real" foundational document of the U.S. government actually the Articles of Confederation?
A: Yes! I was just saying that to the President of Congress the other day.

Read the whole thing.  Via Bettnet.

UPDATE:  The comment threads are good too:

What most people don't know is the Gospel of John was originally written by John Woo.

A glossary of Christian terms.

Worth a few laughs, or at least a chuckle of admiration:

Baptism
Baptists are Christians who believe God can only be accessed by means of a swimming pool or, in some cases, a shallow outdoor stream. The first Baptist was John the Baptist, who was said to eat locusts and honey, although contemporary Baptists generally prefer barbecue.

Sex
Christians are not permitted to have sex. This unpopular doctrine was formulated by Pope Lactose LX at the Council of Disney in 1439. Despite this restriction, Christians have managed to increase their ranks to the point where there are roughly 2 billion of them. Scholars attribute this to the competitive health benefits and generous "flex time" arrangements offered by Christianity.

Via Eve Tushnet.

Harsh truths about Catholicism.

From holyoffice's livejournal:

I, a card-carrying Catholic (in fact, I got my Popery ID card renewed just yesterday; you can do it at Triple A), would like to step in and offer some "red meat" for both sides to chew on.

The problem, as I see it, is that there are a lot of misconceptions about the Catholic Church - but many of these misconceptions are actually held by Catholics themselves. So, in the interest of furthering a sense of understanding with my separated brethren, here are some honest-to-goodness, take-the-log-from-my-eye truths about Mama Church. But I will also do my part to correct some mistaken impressions about the church.


CLAIM: Catholic belief is unscriptural.

This is true. During every Mass, there are two readings from the Old Testament and two from the New Testament, including (always) a Psalm and a reading from one of the Gospels. But this is all for show. In fact, Catholics are forbidden from reading the Bible. The only Catholic who is allowed to own a Bible is the pope, and he won't tell the rest of us what it says.

There's lots more.  h/t Orthonormal Basis, who has a spiffy new blog header of which I very much approve.